i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
