chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
This is the high leading the old right now
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
