Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
