and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
