we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
