I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
