Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
