then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
There's always time for handjobs
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
