I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
