just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
