oh god the rape fog is back!
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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