i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
