just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
