i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
