Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
