i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
A+ Viking dick
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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