The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
