the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just want to make out with him forever
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
