woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
