After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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