in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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