Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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