season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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