Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
