how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Omg I joined a choir last night...
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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