But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
His nipple licking is glorious
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