i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
