I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
