And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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