do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
