His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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