think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
