So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
