I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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