he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
