Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Randomize
