You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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