just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
