my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I'm sobbing to NWA
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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