nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
