I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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