i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
So much rum. So many feels.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
