Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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