I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
