I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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