Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
