Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
