haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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