i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
