found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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